The Little Loved One

Dear God,

I've been bad and mean and ungrateful,

And here I am still asking for your greatness.

I may not be suitable to ask for your help, oh dear God,

but I have nobody else to run to. 

I've never had anybody else to run to but You.

I know you know that You're the only one I can turn to,

You're the only one who cares.

You're the only one who I feel safe.

You're the only one who knows me.

You're the only one who believes in me.

You're the only one who will not judge me and still love me.

You're the one who can turn my tears into hopes,

and frown into smile,

who can make me jump a cliff without questions,

who can make me believe in myself,

who can make me look at the picture with better view,

You're the one who makes it all.

Now I'm here being honest,

let me tell You all of it.

I'm sorry I feel doubtful sometimes,

I'm sorry I'm putting myself down,

I'm sorry I feel lonely,

I'm sorry I can't make myself happy,

I'm sorry I'm not satisfied with what You gave me,

I'm sorry I'm questioning You with what is happening in my life all the time,

I'm sorry my faith isn't strong enough,

I'm sorry I resented you sometimes,

I'm sorry for questioning you why I can't feel the love in any way,

I'm sorry I can't just be normal,

I'm sorry for me being like this,

I'm sorry I disappointed you in many ways.

I know I don't have the right to say this,

but You're help is what I need.

Open my eyes and let me see the beauty that lies before me,

Open my ears to hear the music that calls me,

Open my lips to be able to say thank you,

And Open my heart to change and see what I've missed.

You've always been my shield when I attack myself,

You've always been the one who shed my tears,

You've always been the one who lifts me when I'm down,

And You will always be my Father.

Oh, Father.

Stay by my side and I will be fine.

xo,

Me, the one who doesn't know herself.:'(